The Situation: Who Drank My Apple Juice?

It was an early spring morning and the sun forced its way through the drapes of the Girbaud Hotel. A few beams of light cascaded on the glossy wood floor. They raced up the side of Lil Wayne’s bed, and continued their dance on his face. His eyes barely open, he shifted to look at his clock on the nightstand beside his bed. It was nine o’clock. If he didn’t get up now, he’d be late for his show. He hopped out of the bed, and a chill ran up his body that felt like a thousand cactus needles. The floor was ice cold, so he reached under the bed, and grabbed his warm, pink bunny slippers. He slid his feet into his house shoes and shuffled his way to the bathroom. He walked down the hall, passing Odysseus’ and Rosa Parks’ room. They were both still sound asleep. He made it to the bathroom and gently closed the door, careful not to wake his roommates.

He stared into the mirror. He could see his tattoo on the side of his face was peeling, but he blamed it on age. He splashed water in his face, and brushed his teeth. He was thinking about what was in the kitchen for him to eat. He confirmed to himself that he would have pancakes with a tall glass of apple juice. He spit the Colgate foam into the sink and took one last look in the mirror before he headed to the kitchen.

The only thing that was on Lil Wayne’s mind was that apple juice. On his journey he had decided that he didn’t have time to cook the pancakes, so he’d just get a drink and leave. He had been trying to quit his addiction to cough syrup, so he persuaded himself not to put any in the juice. When he got into the kitchen, he immediately made his way to the refrigerator. He saw the Ocean Mist Apple Juice carton and pulled it out. He opened it, and tilted it towards his lips, waiting for the sweet liquid to drain down his throat. To his surprise, nothing was in the carton. He felt the anger build up inside of him. Every one of his dreads seemed to smoke and simmer.

"Odysseus!” He yelled, “Rosa!” His voice rang through the house. No one moved. He looked in the bottom cabinet, pulled out the biggest, deepest, metalest pot he could find. He grabbed a wooden spoon and walked down the hall.

“This is not a drill! Everybody get up! You know I stunt like my daddy!”

Odysseus jumped up and Rosa walked into the hallway, rubbing her eyes. “What is all this racket?” Rosa asked.

“It seems as though Little Wayne has a problem.” Odysseus said calmly.

“I do have a problem,” Lil Wayne said angrily, “and my name is Lil Wayne!” He held up the empty carton and looked at them long and hard. “Now, when I went to bed last night, this carton was full.” His eyes seemed to burn through their skin. “When I came to get a glass this morning, it was empty. Somebody must’ve been on a late night drinking spree! To make it so bad, y’all know that I’m trying to quit Codeine!” His eye started to twitch.

“Well don’t blame me,” Rosa said. “I was on the bus yesterday, and they made a big deal about me sitting in the front! Shoot, that I was the only seat open, and I was not about to stand on my bad ankle.”

Odysseus chimed in, “Yes. It couldn’t have been me, I was being held captive by Calypso. I just got in this morning!”

Lil Wayne stared at them menacingly, “Those aren’t good excuses. Plus, excuses don’t bring my juice back.”

"You gotta be at a show at ten, right?" Rosa asked.

“Forget that show, I’m not going anywhere until I find out who drunk my juice.”

Odysseus let out a deep sigh, “Here we go again. Are you sure you didn’t drink it? Like the time you accused my great grandmother, who was on oxygen I remind you, of drinking your codeine.”
“That’s your problem, Odysseus. You always bring up old stuff,” Lil Wayne said.

<>

Rosa started to get annoyed. She knew that this was going to last all day. She took a seat next to Odysseus, who must’ve been thinking the same thing, and they continued to watch Lil Wayne go on his rant.

“I know Odysseus,” Lil Wayne clarified, “that you drunk it. You must don’t know why I got sent to jail the last time. I got guns, man.”

“I don’t care what you have.” His calm tone made Lil Wayne even more upset. “I have many men who are faithful to me, and will do anything I tell them.”

“But they won’t do nothing to me!”

“Try me.” This offer hit Lil Wayne’s stomach like a bowling ball. He denied. He looked at his G-Shock, it was one o’clock. No reason to go to that show. He called his manager, and told him he couldn’t make it. He reached into the fridge, grabbed the purple stuff, and glumly walked back to his chamber.

“Why every time I sit on the bus, somebody gotta say something to me?” Rosa was still furious about yesterday. “I mean, I ain’t do nothing but sit down.”

“We all know, Ms. Parks.” Odysseus went back to his room, also, with Rosa close behind him, still mumbling in his ear. All he could think about was how good that apple juice was.